Category: Life at Home

Rand Finds The Last Eyebomb.

Posted on
Jun 11, 2015
1

Last week, I put googly eyes on a bunch of Rand’s stuff around the house, in order to teach him a lesson about … I can’t remember. But I’m sure it was important. Anyway, today he found the last eyebomb. “Someone wants to eat my hair. That’s great. It has googly eyes. I’m so happy.”…

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I Torment My Husband By EyeBombing All His Stuff

Posted on
Jun 3, 2015
40

Someone once told me that the key to any lasting marriage is honesty, which is maybe true for, like, the Pilgrims, or any other archaic religious group that doesn’t believe in the real secret to marriage: passive aggressiveness. Also spite. Having a shared interest or hobby helps, too. But seriously, that last thing is impossible to…

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On Instagram @theeverywhereist

  • Heading down to Ashland for opening weekend with this guy. I feel so lucky that the OSF continues to grace us with this invite, even though I'm basically six raccoons in a coat.
  • My Chrissy has had this on her fridge for a decade. Rand was exhausted, and we were six months away from getting married.
  • Did I buy this ridiculous 80s era overcoat from the Goodwill? Yes. Has Rand expressed profound skepticism over it? Yes.
  • He stole my apron, but he made me risotto.
  • Rand just gave me this pin for Valentine's Day and told me he's the Ralph Wiggum of our relationship. #choochoochooseyou #jonwye #valentinesday
  • An absolutely gorgeous venue for @andreadunlop's book launch. SHE REGRETS NOTHING is out today, and is a suspenseful, salacious, scintillating read. So proud of you, Andrea.
  • Doctor said my cold has ravaged my lungs. This is one instance where I could have gone without the metaphors.
  • How does my brother know how to say the exactly wrong thing to cheer me up? 😂
  • Sick day. Working on an op-ed that I can't turn in until tomorrow because I'm too busy watching This Is Us and feeling terrible. (BTW, I am *such* a Toby.)
  • The most handsome man in the world bought me a taco and sang me Billy Bragg. We talked about regret, and he told me he was sorry he took up so much of my life. And I laughed. Because it's not his fault that I can't stop thinking about him.

All Over The Place

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