While traveling in Scotland, I saw this ad on a bus, and laughed my ass off for 10 minutes (I still have plenty of ass left. Don’t worry):

They seem to have a preference for one of the actors ...
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Which, of course, prompted this exchange …
Me: It makes total sense that they’d glorify their own countrymen over American actors. I mean, it’s not like there’s a ton of Scottish stars who make it big in the U.S. There’s Sean Connery, and Pierce Brosnan and -
Rand: Pierce Brosnan’s Irish, not Scottish.
Me: What’s the difference again?
Rand: I’m not talking to you any more.
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So, since my husband’s not talking to me, I’ll ask you …


I suppose you want to know what all this nonsense is about. You’ve come to the right page...