Where the heck are we? (And other important questions.)

Posted on
Mar 22, 2012

There are mornings when I wake up, and haven’t the foggiest idea of where I am. This is neither as alarming or as glamorous as it sounds. It’s usually in a hotel room somewhere. And more often than not, Rand is with me, so I can’t complain.

Travel enough, and I suppose it’s a natural side effect. Some places all start to look alike. And other places look … well, unlike anything, really. Certainly not as you’d expect them to look, that’s for sure.

And that’s where I found myself on the first day of the year. I couldn’t help but look around and wonder: where exactly was I? It was only one of many questions that followed …

Questions like, how on earth did I end up on a John Deere utility vehicle?

Why doesn’t Rand look happier to be in the back?

This is the face of bemusement.

Does wrapping plastic wrap around plants actually protect them from the cold? (Yes, apparently.)

Do the sheep have names? (No. But the little ones have numbers painted on their sides.)

Why are the branding irons green? (Because they were dipped in paint.)

In order to mark the aforementioned sheep.

Is there manure on my boots? (A little.)

Is it okay if I think that lamb is delicious, but still manage to find this guy adorable? (Let’s not think too hard on this one.)

Is delivering lambs anything like delivering babies? (“They scream less.”)

Do you remember the first time you met Rand? (“He was hollering. He does that when you hold him up by the toe.”)

Can I touch the plants?

Oh. Okay.

Is this one part tribble?

Is this seriously the largest collection of privately owned succulents on the east coast? (The New York Times says yes.)

Does this flower clash with my scarf?

Are you mad at me because I almost touched the plant? Are you sure? Cuz before, you kinda yelled.

What happens if I touch this dial? Okay, okay, I won’t. Maybe you should put up another sign.

Where are we again? Oh, yeah. Jersey.

Not what I had imagined Jersey would look like. You can’t really blame me for forgetting, right?

Can we come back here again? Soon? Okay. Good. Good, because I like New Jersey.

Leave a Comment

  • Ian

    In your pic captioned “Is this one part tribble?”, there’s a rather suspicious looking cactus top left…

  • how could you avoid making a joke about the cactus on the left of the tribble?

    • Oh … oh sweet jesus. I don’t know. I really don’t.

      • Ak

        I had the same reaction and re-read the caption to find the joke! I giggled anyway 🙂

    • CatCatAttack

      Ack, you beat me to it.
      I suggest the joke bring in the do not touch the plants sign.

  • I like New Jersey, too! I grew up amid the farmland of South Jersey.

    It really is hard to believe you missed that cactus. You can always post an update 😉

  • Melanie

    Thank you Felix! I laughed at the tribble comment then went, “Oh, wait a second….”

  • loved the captions/ train of thoughts!

  • Lois

    The cactus to the left of the tribble makes me think ‘ouchy’

  • Ashley

    Haha Is is bad that I know exactly what a tribble is?

    Just started reading your blog. Love your witty comments and wonderful pictures!

More from The Blog

On Instagram @theeverywhereist

  • Her name is Pippin but I call her Porkchop.
  • He asked me if this photo of him as a kid looked like him.
...
Me: Hold on. (Scribbles on phone.) Yes. Now it does.
  • Downtown Flemington is obviously haunted but still super charming.
  • I can't deal with this. #toocute #babytequila
  • Philadelphia in the snow is breaking my heart.
. . . . 
#snow #Philadelphia #independencemall
  • Finally got to meet Niko. This is the closest I came to getting a clear shot of the little squirmer.
  • It's snowing here in Philly and we're trying to keep warm.
  • He's never not cute.
  • Walked through the Italian Market in Philly because Rand had never been, and encountered a bunch of guys who were dressed like Burgess Meredith and quoting lines from Rocky. No, for real.
  • He fell asleep on his hair on the flight over and asked me to fix it.

All Over The Place

Buy my book and I promise I'll never ask you for anything again.

BE AWESOME. BUY IT.