Tag: Life at Home

Rand Finds The Last Eyebomb.

Posted on
Jun 11, 2015
1

Last week, I put googly eyes on a bunch of Rand’s stuff around the house, in order to teach him a lesson about … I can’t remember. But I’m sure it was important. Anyway, today he found the last eyebomb. “Someone wants to eat my hair. That’s great. It has googly eyes. I’m so happy.”…

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I Torment My Husband By EyeBombing All His Stuff

Posted on
Jun 3, 2015
40

Someone once told me that the key to any lasting marriage is honesty, which is maybe true for, like, the Pilgrims, or any other archaic religious group that doesn’t believe in the real secret to marriage: passive aggressiveness. Also spite. Having a shared interest or hobby helps, too. But seriously, that last thing is impossible to…

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On Instagram @theeverywhereist

  • Rand just gave me this pin for Valentine's Day and told me he's the Ralph Wiggum of our relationship. #choochoochooseyou #jonwye #valentinesday
  • An absolutely gorgeous venue for @andreadunlop's book launch. SHE REGRETS NOTHING is out today, and is a suspenseful, salacious, scintillating read. So proud of you, Andrea.
  • Doctor said my cold has ravaged my lungs. This is one instance where I could have gone without the metaphors.
  • How does my brother know how to say the exactly wrong thing to cheer me up? 😂
  • Sick day. Working on an op-ed that I can't turn in until tomorrow because I'm too busy watching This Is Us and feeling terrible. (BTW, I am *such* a Toby.)
  • The most handsome man in the world bought me a taco and sang me Billy Bragg. We talked about regret, and he told me he was sorry he took up so much of my life. And I laughed. Because it's not his fault that I can't stop thinking about him.
  • It's the 25th anniversary of Andre the Giant's passing. Here's the time I dressed up as him for Halloween.
  • I'm an almost-40-year-old woman who just bought herself a unicorn cookie because she's stressed about work. AMA.
  • I first met Chad around the time I had brain surgery. He'd just gone through the same experience with a very different diagnosis. He went on to have SIX more brain surgeries and was part of a litany of clinical trials for his brain cancer. Through it all he was funny and brash and so painfully honest about his experience. He was also instrumental in helping me finish my book - I sent Chad a chapter every month while working on my manuscript. He joked that I'd enlisted a dying man to help me meet my deadline. I hadn't emailed him in months, and just found out today that he passed away right before Christmas. It was a long time coming, but I am still blindsided by the loss.
...
Goodbye you wonderful, brilliant, exuberant asshole. I knew you'd break my heart.
  • Thirty-three years later, and she's still my hero. One year later, and I still miss her. #PrincessLeia #CarrieFisher #CarrieOn

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