Traveling with Mom

Posted on
Jul 19, 2009
 
Posted in: Random Musings, WTF

I’m in San Diego for a week with my family – I’ll do a proper wrap-up when I get home, after I’m done eating my feelings and drinking away my pain. It is not that I don’t love my family. Really. I do … yeah.

No – it’s simply that traveling is exciting enough, and traveling with my mother is, well … very exciting. Exciting because you might get strip-searched, arrested, or possibly deported. I’m not sure if it’s like this for everyone – I suspect, though, that it may be. I mean, lots of people have moms who travel 8 hours by train to crouch outside George Clooney’s house and contemplate running in when the gate opens (but thankfully don’t). Right?

And lots of moms accidentally carry 8-inch long stainless steel hiking pick-axes in their carry-ons, resulting in a sort of fiasco that their children scarcely remember, because god is merciful and causes us to black out such things. Right?

And lots of moms peer at their fellow passengers, before leaning over and whispering, “That woman over there … she was born a man. I’m sure of it.” Right?

Right?

Moments after this photo was taken, I said, lets go! and headed out the door. In a span of 20 feet, SHE GOT LOST.

Oh, don’t smile so innocently. You know full well the trouble you cause.

Leave a Comment

More from The Blog

On Instagram @theeverywhereist

  • Happy Halloween from the Joker and Harley Quinn, and to hell with the misogynistic manbabies out there.
  • First photo ever tagged of us on Facebook. Circa 12 years ago. Can we talk about how I've aged like an overripe piece of fruit left in the sun, but @randderuiter has only gotten hotter?
  • I call this look "I just ate a whole bunch of Violet Crumble and now I'm about to fall asleep from the sugar crash."
  • New personal slogan.
  • Do we want to leave Italy? No. Did we eat enough pasta to sustain us until next time? Also no.
  • The sky really is that blue. And the towers really are that slanted. #Bologna
  • Fried anchovies: accomplished.
  • We made this.
  • Everything I am, I owe to pasta. #cibocookingschool #bolognafood #pasta
  • Sometimes the time of your life happens at the most inopportune times, and that's okay. #cibocookingschool #bolognafood

All Over The Place

Buy my book and I promise I'll never ask you for anything again.

BE AWESOME. BUY IT.