I have the emotional maturity of an 11-year-old.

A really immature 11-year-old.

Remember how I laughed maniacally at the scene where Jean Claude Van Damme walks around naked in Universal Soldier? Not much has changed since then. I think the human anatomy is hysterical.

I mean, it’s just so squishy and floppy and weirdly dangly. At least, in my experience it is. Your experience with the naked human form might be a thing of hairless, smooth-skinned, muscle-toned beauty.

That’s just fine. Good luck with that. My life is full of cake and dangly bits, and this weird zit that recently appeared – I kid you not – on the tip of my frigging nose.

I laugh at it all.

So just imagine, dear reader, what happened when I walked into the North Third Restaurant in Northern Liberties, Philadelphia, and saw this on the wall:

OMG. OMG. OMG. Boobies.

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I’m sorry the picture isn’t better. I was in hysterics, which makes it difficult to actually take a proper photo.

But wait – it gets better. See the lovely gray-haired couple sitting in from of the painting? Those are Rand’s grandparents.

That’s right: my grandparents-in-law were sitting directly in front of a ginormous painting of someone’s rack.

I could not keep it together.

Fortunately, neither could anyone else. We all giggled and pointed and feigned shock. Except for Rand’s grandparents. Talk about maturity. They seemed totally unfazed by the whole thing.

At one point, Rand’s grandfather asked us what we were laughing about. Then he pointed to the painting behind him and said, completely straight-faced, “Why do they have a giant ad for bowling balls?”

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Then he turned to Rand’s grandmother. “Did you see the ad?” he asked her, pointing behind him.

She shrugged.

“It’s nothing I haven’t seen before,” she said.

THEY WERE DOING THIS WITH COMPLETELY STRAIGHT FACES. It was amazing. And roughly ten seconds later, they erupted into giggles themselves.

Let me tell you, kids: sometimes being 11 is awesome, no matter how old you are.

Full list of categories:  WTF » WTF Wednesdays
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Comments (11)

  1. 1
    Kate says:

    Grandma may be straighfaced in that last photo, but she’s gnawing on her finger to swing it. What a lovely couple – the looks on their faces say they’ve shared lots of goofy giggles over the years.

  2. 2
    Taryn says:

    It would be impossible to sit under that painting and not giggle yourself silly! It’s just that ridiculous!

  3. 3
    Jen says:

    Is it just me or does the ginormous rack have either a sun burn or tan lines?

  4. 4
    Courtney says:

    I’m dying laughing! DYING!!! DYINGGGGGGG. I feel like I’m being attacked by a weirdly 3-D nipple!

  5. 5
    Amy says:

    So I can’t think of anything, ummm, appropriate to say about the artwork. What about… “How lifelike!” doesn’t do much for my appetite, but I’m probably not the target audience. Anyway…

    You were in my hometown and I did not know it!! Okay, I actually have lived in the suburbs for ages now, but I was raised in the city. If you find yourself out this way again, come to West Chester. Lots of food and (a few) things to do. I’d love to say I’d show you around- but that sounds so …awkward/weird/ stalkery…but the invitation is there. And i’m not weird or stalkery. Occaisionally awkward, though ;) LOVE your blog- I tell everyone about it. Take care and happy travelling!!

  6. 6
    Kathleen says:

    When I grow up I can only wish to be like your Grandparents-in-law. Hahahah…I’m still laughing hysterically!

  7. 7
    Skye says:

    You are so close!! come visit me in B’more!! Miss you!

  8. 8
    Sheri says:

    Totally off the above subject but i was recently in NYC staying on the lower east side. I had to report on Buttercup Bake Shop – i believe you had mentioned Magnolia something and their decline since fame struck. this place (BBS) is by one of th eoriginal owners of Magnolia (i think).
    2nd avenue between 51st and 52nd (east).
    we (my husband and 2 teenagers and I) had delicious cupcakes and other treats there!
    wonderful
    just sayin’
    Sheri

  9. 9
    Sylvia says:

    That rack looks like a Parisian deodorant ad…

  10. 10
    Katie says:

    I couldn’t stop laughing when I read this post! You got to love older people, they honestly just tell it like it is! …but am i the only one who noticed that the boobs are anatomically incorrect? I thought the LEFT boob was usually bigger than the right… this girl’s right boob is WAAAYYY bigger than her left lol

  11. 11
    Lucy says:

    I know the feeling. I took a drawing class last year, without realizing that for half of the time, we’d have to do life drawing. Luckily, my easel was big enough to hide behind when the model got naked and I giggled like a madman. One of the only times when I wish I was more mature.

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