The Everywhereist

I am back. I didn’t manage to get a post up yesterday (for the first time in quite a while) since I had a bit of a whirlwind day in Chicago.

And by “whirlwind” I mean “extravagant shopping”.

That’s right, faithful reader(s): I sold you out for an incredibly cute cropped black leather jacket that makes me look skinny. I found it at the Nordstrom on Miracle Mile. I kind of want to wear it all the time, despite the fact that it is cropped and not exceptionally warm (and that it is currently 18 degrees in Seattle, which Rand describes as “a stupid temperature”). (more…)

Prologue:

I live in Seattle, a town that, despite its growing size, is seriously lacking in the public transportation department. The absurdity of it almost sounds invented: we actually have an underground dug out already (a result of some serious city planning mistakes made a hundred or so years ago). Rumor has it that decades ago, the city laid down tracks for a subway system. The problem? They were the wrong sized tracks.  They didn’t fit the subway cars, or some nonsense like that (I think I originally heard this story from one of the guides on the Underground Tour, and couldn’t find any supporting evidence online, so who knows …).

We’ve not got a lightrail system which will (theoretically) take people from north Seattle all the way down to the airport and back. This sounds so magical and unlikely that I’ve also started telling people that riding on it will cure acne and give you rock-hard abs, and might just get you laid, to boot. Being married, I have no need for the thing.

I’ve always had a bit of a chip on my shoulder about our lack of a subway. It seems to separate the Metropolises from the Smallvilles. A subway makes a city. Things happen on a subway. And many, many things happen on the New York Subway. (more…)

My mom called me the other day. She’s down in California, taking care of my Auntie P. She left the day after I got back to Seattle.

“I can tell you were here,” my mom said, and I could almost hear her smiling at the other end of the line.

“How?” I asked.

“I can just tell. You’ve left your signature. I opened up the cutlery drawer, and looked at how things were organized, and I thought, ’Geraldine was here.’”

I can only assume she noticed this because I, apparently unlike everyone else in my family, puts knives with the blades pointing down. But her observation made me smile. (more…)

One the Monday before Thanksgiving, I was upgraded to first class for my Alaska Airlines flight down to San Diego.

I’ve just reached MVP status on Alaska, and it’s the first time I’ve had status on any airline, so up until now, first class has been pretty much a pipe dream for me. I didn’t even know I could request it. On the flight down, they automatically upgraded me at the gate, and I actually asked why.

“Well,” the woman explained, “it’s what we do for MVPs when there’s space available.”

Naturally, I was quite excited (though I wished I had worn nicer shoes. My keens looked a little haggard). I ended up sitting in the first row by the window, and for a while didn’t take much notice of the other passengers. They seemed like nice people, particularly the two gentleman who quickly helped me store my rather heavy suitcase in the overhead compartment. The flight attendant (flight crew member?) assigned to our section was seemed friendly and funny. He was a bald guy in his 40s, and I could hear him chatting with the other passengers, but I had my nose in my Swedish thriller, so I wasn’t really paying attention to what they were saying. (more…)

Part 1 in an ongoing series …

Travelling to see my family is always incredibly educational. Just when I think I know them, I end up discovering something completely interesting - like the specific terms of their probation, for example, or which Eastern European ethnic group “has it coming.”  

On this trip, I figured I wouldn’t uncover anything too interesting – after all, I go to my aunt’s and uncle’s house all the time, so I’ve probably uncovered all the hidden family mysteries their house is hiding, right?

Foolish mortal! OF COURSE not. There’s always more crazy to be found amongst my family. Our neurosis is the gift that keeps on itching. This time, I was lucky enough to learn the following … (more…)

I’m knackered. Completely beat. I can’t believe it’s only Tuesday (as I type this), but I suppose that doesn’t really mean anything. I’ve been in Ocean Beach, San Diego for the last 10 days.  Time doesn’t seem to pass at normal intervals down here.

I often say that if I had one day left to live, I would spend it in Ocean Beach … because every second down here lasts an eternity. (Bet that’s not where you thought I was going to go with that).

It might have something to do with the warm climate, melting everything together. I lived in Florida for seven years. Those seven years merged into one long, endless summer, which is far less pleasant than it sounds. I don’t really remember seasons, or years passing, or what happened when. I just have a vague recollection of what it was like to be in Florida. Similarly, the last 10 days, while long, all seem to have merged into one day.

A very long, tiring day. (more…)

Dear Carl’s Junior,

We live in a melting pot. Did you know that? I swear, it’s true. I have friends from every part of the world. It’s awesome. They teach me things all the time (like that in England, “Friends” is considered funny!). And they have adorable children. Here we are at our wedding with some of our world-savvy friends:

That right, kids - I've made you poster children for multi-cultural awesomeness.

Their daughter is friggin amazing, and fluent in Japanese and English. She’s wonderful, and I’m not just saying that because her dad is one of the four readers of my blog (Hi, assface Philip!). They also blog about their adventures with their super-cute kid, which I suggest you check out). (more…)