The Blog

This Holiday Season, Be A Selfish Cook.

Posted on
Nov 26, 2024
 
Posted in: Food, Random Musings

Despite my numerous protestations, several letters to the editor, and one shockingly well-funded Kickstarter, Thanksgiving is somehow upon us again. If you are anything like me (clinically depressed and awesome), you are wondering how we ended up here again. In my case, I assume it’s punishment for the time I said Vince Vaughn was “kind…

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It is Time For Our Cockroach Era

Posted on
Nov 9, 2024
 

Hello. Hi. It’s me. Hey. Howya doing? Yeah, ME, TOO. (Sobs turn into maniacal laughing.) (Slowly transforms into The Joker.) It was a tough year before this past Tuesday, to be honest. If someone had asked me, I would have easily marked it one of the most difficult ones of my personal and professional life.…

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Goodreads Reviews I Left for Myself While Writing My Book

Posted on
Feb 26, 2024
Picture of a woman reclining in a chair with a pensive look on her face, cradling her own book to her chest.
 
Posted in: Book, Uncategorized

  ★★★ Idea Has Potential. I don’t hate the idea of this book. It feels like the author (full disclosure: it me) doesn’t really have a clear idea of it, and instead of writing the book they keep getting distracted and reading about dysfunctional relationships on reddit. I keep calling it a “book proposal” even…

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A Dry January, All Year Long.

Posted on
Jan 22, 2024
 
Posted in: Food, Personal Essay

People keep reminding me it is January. I consider this an act of aggression. I keep writing “October” on all my checks. I also keep writing 1997. I also keep writing checks? What the hell is even going on with January, anyway? How can a January ever possibly feel normal? The year just started; the…

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Invisible Pie Labor.

Posted on
Nov 21, 2023
 

It’s the Tuesday before Thanksgiving and as holidays bear down upon us, I find myself repeating the same refrain again and again: You do not need to make pumpkin pie from scratch. You do not need to make anything from scratch. You do not need to recreate a family recipe passed down for generations. Your…

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Hindsight is the Best Filter

Posted on
Nov 6, 2023
 

While conducting an archeological dig of my office, unearthing crumbling notebooks that contained the early drafts of all the books I have written, and all the books I intended to write but somehow did not, I found a box of old photos. They were from a summer I’d spent in Europe when I was 20…

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Sometimes It Is Okay to Not Talk About the Awful Things.

Posted on
Oct 20, 2023
 
Posted in: Random Musings

I am old enough to remember when the Internet was a largely useless place for most people. My college dormmates would sit patiently, waiting hours for image files to download in large ribboned chunks, in hopes of something salacious appearing. If the image was mislabeled, they could find that they’d waited a good twenty minutes…

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