Month: May 2015

I Went Paleo and Now I Hate Everything.

Posted on
May 31, 2015
 

Recently, I went pseudo Paleo. I say pseudo, because, like most things in my life, I’ve jumped in headfirst without putting any thought or research into it (this is also how I ended up taking a workout class called “Insanity.” Afterwards, I was drooling and delirious. So I guess it delivered). So, despite being totally…

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Things in Women’s Magazines that Make Me Stabby

Posted on
May 28, 2015
 

Sometimes, during our travels, I will purchase a fashion magazine at the airport. It’s a terrible idea: they’re expensive and they don’t make me feel good about myself, but for some reason, I keep buying them (note: this also applies to skinny jeans and ten-pack-passes to barre class. Sometimes it’s nice to pretend we’re something we…

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OMG. Baby Owls at Kirstenbosch, Cape Town.

Posted on
May 25, 2015
 
Posted in: Attractions

I was tempted to once again use last week’s gimmick – of attempting to write about the Holy Grail, but getting distracted by my fascination with flightless birds – at the beginning of this post. But I didn’t want to exhaust the joke and besides, I don’t need any pretense here: this post is about…

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Ostriches at the Cape of Good Hope, South Africa

Posted on
May 22, 2015
 
Posted in: Attractions

Okay, where was I before yesterday’s digression into the flightless birds of South Africa? Oh, right. I was telling you about the Holy Grail. Arguably one of the most important relics in all of- OSTRICHES. Err, sorry. Heh. That was weird. The Holy Grail. One of the most important relics in all of Catholicism. Ahem.…

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Penguins at Boulders Beach, South Africa.

Posted on
May 21, 2015
 
Posted in: Attractions

I was in the process of working on a post about the Holy Grail. My family is Catholic, so I figured it was kind of important, because the grail marks the point in time when we all should have started feeling really guilty about stuff. Anyway, I was thinking about the post, and drafting a…

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I’m Rejoicing in Tom Brady’s Punishment. Here’s Why.

Posted on
May 12, 2015
 

Yesterday, the NFL announced the consequences Tom Brady and the Patriots would face for deflating game balls during their playoff match versus the Indianapolis Colts. The details, by now, are known to virtually everyone who’s interested in the game, and even to those who aren’t: a four-game suspension for Brady, a million-dollar fine for the Patriots,…

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On Instagram @theeverywhereist

  • I have lamented the existence of blue M&Ms (and mourned the loss of my beloved tan candies) for a long time. I've been systematically eating only the blue ones to try to return to my beloved 80s palette, and we're almost there.

#bringbacktanM&Ms
  • We may have gotten a little drastic at the salon today and I'm so delighted. I forgot how much I love having short hair. ❤️💇‍♀️
  • Okay, so maybe this unexpected cameo had us cracking up and also screaming at the TV.
  • Whirlwind trip with Captain Twinkly Eyes now over. So excited to write about the amazing shows we saw. Thank you for a wonderful time, @osfashland! See you again very soon.
  • Last show of the weekend, and the third in 24 hours. Phew! Thank you, @osfashland. #hairsprayosf
  • Me: Are you cold? Do you want to borrow my giant scarf?

Him: Yes. (Minutes later he started singing American Woman because he apparently knows that meme.)
  • Show #2. Thanks, @osfashland. We're so excited for Cambodian Rock Band. The energy of opening weekend is just so magical.
  • Me: "I want to do an Instagram style vignette with our @osfashland tickets." Him: "I want to be in it." #cambodianrockband #osf2019 #oregonshakespearefestival
  • It begins! So excited for opening weekend of this season's Oregon Shakespeare Festival!
  • My brother keeps using his phone's autoresponses to reply to texts and the niceness is so out of character it alarms me.

#growingupwithsiblings #siblingrivalry #hessortofamonster

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